The Day Mommy was Mean to the Bunny

Ready for another poop story? I took the bunny to McDonald's for lunch yesterday - her request. I was trying to convince her she'd rather have lo mein noodles and bourbon chicken, but she insisted on a cheeseburger. Sometimes it's really hard to deny my princess! Anyway, all was great until she decided she needed to go potty.

Going potty in public isn't a big deal. She'll go anywhere and everywhere. In fact, she likes having to potty in public. Even if she has just emptied her bladder at home, she's always able to muster up something to tinkle out.

So, I boosted her up onto the big toilet and she pooped. I wiped her - standard protocol - and she hopped off. *SWOOSH* The automatic toilet flushed her poop! And she immediately started screaming. Screaming accompanied with giant tears and flowing snot. Did I mention we were in a public restroom? Good times. She was carrying on this way not because the SWOOSH scared her, but because SHE didn't flush her poop. "It's Jordan's poop to flush! It's my poop! I flush it! You don't flush my poop!"

You read that right. She gets upset if anyone but herself flushes HER poop. She thought I had flushed. I hadn't. The toilet did it by itself, but I got in trouble. There's no reasoning with a three year-old; much less, reasoning with a three year-old who thinks she's been wrongfully denied the privilege of flushing away her own poopy glory.

One time, Noah flushed the bunny's poop because he was standing right next to the flusher. She got sooooo angry. And cried. And sobbed herself to sleep for her nap. Then woke up and sobbed some more. And berated Noah for flushing her poop. Can you believe my obsessive, little, got-to-flush-her-own-poop princess holds grudges?! So harsh. Poor Noah!

Immediately, she demanded to get back on the toilet to poop again so she could flush it. She had none left. But she did manage a few drips. And this time she did get to, "push the bunnent* to flush it myself." I shudder to think what would have happened had I not been able to disable the automatic sensor...

From now on, when we're in a public restroom with automatic flushing toilets, I MUST remember the little trick my friend Laurie taught me to temporarily disable the automatic flusher. Tear off a couple squares of toilet paper, lick a spot near the edge, and stick it over the sensor. Brilliant, no?

I'm not sure what's going to be worse the next time we potty in a public restroom; forgetting to disable the sensor or having my child say, "Mommy, don't forget to lick the toilet paper."

The video is the other thing that happened that day. The bunny tells it like it happened: She drank chocolate milk. She finished it. I threw away the empty container. She screamed at me. She wanted to drink her milk. I told her it was empty. She screamed at me. She wanted to drink her milk. I told her it was empty. She screamed at me...

*The bunny's pronunciation for button.